The ReLATE Show Welcomes Lost Boy #595

Jodi: Hello and welcome back to The ReLate Show, where we can all relate to the sting of rejection. I’m your host, Jodi Moore. Today, please give a warm welcome to Lost Boy #595.

*crickets*

Jodi: Oh, I should explain. Cricket sounds are the highest praise here.

Lost Boy: Yes, I read your last interview. Thank you for inviting me.

Jodi: It’s a pleasure to meet you. So, what’s your story?

Lost Boy: Well, it should be Peter Pan, but I always seem to be the ‘plus one’.

Jodi: The plus one?

Lost Boy: I keep getting told if they could only take one more, it would be me, but that they currently have too many lost children on their list.

Jodi: Sometimes champagne rejections hurt the most.

Lost Boy: Champagne? Yuck. I’m just a kid. I don’t drink champagne.

Jodi: No, champagne rejections are when they take that extra step to let you know you did a good job. It means you’re getting close.

Lost Boy: Oh, well, I was offered Peter Pan’s understudy.

Jodi: That sounds encouraging. How’d that work out?

Lost Boy: *sighs* Did you know publishing isn’t like live theater? A character who gets sick doesn’t just get replaced. Apparently, every detail – including the main character’s sudden illness – has to make sense and add to the story itself. And if it doesn’t, there’s something called Critique People that point it out and make the writers fix it. I don’t think that’s responsible at all. What if that one character makes everyone sick?

Jodi: That would be part of the story line and add to the tension, I would think. And they’re called critique partners. It’s artists helping other artists get better at their craft.

Lost Boy: *narrows eyes* Wait a minute...you’re not one of those Critique People, are you?

Jodi: Umm...

Lost Boy:

Jodi: Maybe chocolate might help?

Lost Boy: Oh, don’t even get me started. When I try to imagine chocolate – any type of food anymore, I just...can’t. And a Lost Boy without the ability to imagine a feast is in serious trouble. *dabs at eyes* I try to think happy thoughts like Tink tells us to, but...

Jodi: I can relate. Sometimes, it’s hard to remain positive.

Lost Boy: Right? I think I’m suffering from Imposter Syndrome. Like maybe I’m not really lost at all...maybe...I’m found! I just wanna get lost in a good book!

Jodi: Hmm. Technically, I think you are trying to be found in a good book.

Lost Boy: *scrunches forehead*

Jodi: *raises eyebrows*

Lost Boy: You know, I never thought about it that way.

Jodi: Sometimes a tiny change in perspective is all it takes.

Lost Boy: Hey...I think I’m doing it! Yes, I’m doing it!!! *imagines chocolate feast*

Gretel (spider extraordinaire/producer): A-N-D... that’s a wrap...or should I say, an un-wrap?